I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart. Supposing they find you and take you away?—and she unprepared? Have you thought of that? Why did you marry her?" "God alone knows!" "And you don't love her! What kind of a woman do you want, anyhow?"—with rising anger. “You come into these sordid surroundings—you mustn’t mind my calling them sordid—and it makes them seem as though they didn’t matter. All the sombre visions she had been pressing back, fighting out of her thoughts, swarmed over the barrier and crushed her. The Times slipped from his fingers. The worst was over now. At least that, I think, is what makes a clever woman’s independent career so much more difficult than a clever man’s. ‘What you can do, Lucy, rather than make enquiries, is introduce me to this comte and comtesse. He opened the drawer of the writing table. ’ The lady uttered a scornful sound. ’ Melusine took refuge in defiance. C. My uterus and my ovaries are gone. His first wife. He gurgled as if trying to communicate.
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